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To Embrace Changes

Added on by Ridzki.

ACCOMMODATING POINT,, Paulo Coelho wrote on 11FEB2010,, In one of my books (The Zahir), I try to understand why people are so afraid of changing. When I was right in the middle of writing the text, I came across an odd interview with a woman who had just written a book on – guess what? – love.

The journalist asks whether the only way a human being can become happy is to find their beloved. The woman says no:

“Love changes, and nobody understands that. The idea that love leads to happiness is a modern invention, dating from the late 17th century. From that time on, people have learned to believe that love should last for ever and that marriage is the best way to exercise love. In the past there was not so much optimism about the longevity of passion.

“Romeo and Juliet isn’t a happy story, it’s a tragedy. In the last few decades, expectation has grown a lot regarding marriage being the path towards personal accomplishment. Disappointment and dissatisfaction have also grown at the same time.”

According to the magical practices of the witchdoctors in the North of Mexico, there is always an event in our lives that is responsible for our having stopped making progress. A trauma, a particularly bitter defeat, disappointment in love, even a victory that we fail to quite understand, ends up making us act cowardly and incapable of moving ahead. The witchdoctor finds and gets rid of this “accommodating point”. To do so, he has to review our life and discover where this point lies.

Why?

Because, according to the story that we were told, at a certain moment in our lives “we reach our limit”. There are no more changes to be made. We won’t grow any more. Both professionally and in love, we have reached the ideal point, and it’s best to leave things as they are. But the truth is that we can always go further. Love more, live more, risk more.

Immobility is never the best solution. Because everything around us changes (including love) and we must accompany that rhythm.

I have been married to the same person for 30 years, but methaphorically speaking, the same marriage contains several “new marriages” during our relationship. Our bodies and souls changed, and we are still togeher. If we wanted to keep on as we were in 1979, I don’t think we would have come so far.

In my humble opinion:

I agree with the concept of changes and moving in the the part of our life, especially in the term of marriage or just simply living our life. but then again, but people are sometimes too afraid to move forward and just learn something new. They afraid to leave their comfort zones.

In our life we are controlled by several sets of rules which are given to us in various forms like constitutions, religious dogma and protocols, but it is our decision to break or upkeep those rules and to live our life like we wanted to be.

Why?

Because I believe we live only once and life itself it's a process of trial and errors. We learn something new and we'll discover something due to those changes. This will bring me to my next believe; changes in life are never bad, even though how scary it would be. This is simply because through changes you'll learn new things and by learning those things you'll have the experiences to teach your offspring how life should be lived.

The conclusion that I want to make is I'm all agree with Coelho with his point regarding the changes in life, the big or the small, the significant or non-significant and expected or unexpected. It's just the matter whether we want to embrace it or not.

The Times They Are a Changin'

Added on by Ridzki.

I have plenty to write but I did not seems to know how to start. But here it goes: The Beginning of The Spiraling Madness

I've always said to myself and to others, that changes whatever the form it would be is always a great thing to do. Not only it allows you to embark and see new stuff, experience new things and learning about all possibilities.

But then again when changes come in rapidly I myself have to struggle and keeping my head above the water.

Would things be better without the rapid changes then? I always ask that question to myself.

Let's start on the beginning the very beginning: the decision to join the workforce, experience the world and have yourself shaped by the mock cruelty of the world are all the words and descriptions that my mother would tell me when I asked that I still want to stay in the fortress. Now after a year almost passed, I think that the words and descriptions have been ringing true. Then again I didn't expect it be like this.

Swift and powerful it may seems but the changes are chronically over and over sweeping me off my feet.

And when the time to breathe come, I hardly believe that things that surround me have been wildly changes without I even allowing or prohibiting it from.

It's  the same feeling that arises when you're getting kidnapped, blindfolded and taken to a place that you did not know existed and getting executed without knowing who or for what matter you're deserve to get such treatment.

Such is life they say, you'll never get what you want or what you deserve. But later on you'll see that those you get are what you'll need.

Now time already passed, but still the past haunts me every  now and then.

Logic and Emotion

Come to think of it, the matters that happen to me are probably because of the everlasting clash between logic and emotion. No matter what the head say it's always the heart that leads.

Such matter caused by this is always wrenching, because no matter what I argument would I say, I always be in the losing side. then again I'm having my argument with emotional being after all.

Tiring as it may seems, it serves me as a reminder from time to time.

Profound New Tiredness

Liberation.yes.  I do feel liberated after all the events surrounding me unfolded.

Betrayed.yes. what can I say? do I imagine that these kind of things will happen to me? not if I am able to know what happens behind my back.

But then again I did feel tired.

I felt that I just want to sleep in the everlasting storms that had come and will come to me.

I wanted to be swept away by those storms, carried over to the calm. waking up in a state of newborn, without memories. Blank as the white paper.

But as I said, that's what I want, not what I need, and it's not me who decide what I need or which one I do not need.

Then I kept my head high and lead my way out. Till to the point that I almost have no time for myself.

Such again tiredness come to me, not as the storm. But as the struggle. Strangely enough I do feel that this will last even longer. I do feel that contentment and fulfillment is merely a concept, an imagination or fatamorgana to be exact.

It is as bleak as my future. Unimaginable beyond the point of age that I have now.

Such these are the words of me. In which I hope peace and grace would've come easily.

But if the struggle it is to be. Then what can I say?

"Protect me from what I want but give me what I need"

Cheers